With age comes wisdom, right? I recently made the conscious choice to stop the life-long habit I’ve had of nagging myself for not getting ‘all the things’ done. It’s taken more than four decades (and a little help from Ganesha) but I feel I’m starting to get the hang of living a peaceful daily life.
I’ve discovered that I have more energy when I am not holding myself back with self-judgement. I’m not saying it doesn’t still creep in, and after a recent, particularly scathing self-critique regarding missed deadlines I found myself in a funk I couldn’t shake. It colored my whole day.
As much as I tried to use my intellect to draw myself out of that mood, I just couldn’t. My schedule was too packed to allow for the practice of yoga asanas. So I sat myself down to meditate, and it helped — for the time I was meditating. But once I opened my eyes; good-bye peace, hello funk!
As I move through life, I come up against obstacles all the time. Often they are of my own making. My mind manufactures them with fear always at the ready to fan the flames. Sometimes I freeze. Sometimes I run away from the issue du jour. And sometimes things manifest as inward anger, frustration or doubt.
An Elephant-Inspired Epiphany
I encourage my yoga students to avoid self-doubt and self-judgment and yet I continue to struggle with these things myself.
They say we teach that which we need to learn. Clearly, I’m living proof and, on some level, I feel like that recent “bad day” was the straw that broke the camel’s back (or in this case, the elephant’s!)
In the very early days of practicing yoga, I took a liking to Ganesha, the elephant-headed god of Hinduism. He is jolly and plump, always happy, has an affinity toward sweets and is believed to be the remover of obstacles.
Perhaps it was some “knowing” deep in my unconscious, that caused me to gravitate toward this helper deity; and he towards me.
There are many tools we can use to seek inner peace and self-soothe. Among mine is a comforting place I have created in my mind and visit when I need to re-center.
That place is a meadow, with a big shady tree and long grasses that gently bend and sway in the breeze. The first time I went to this place in meditation, a huge African elephant began stomping toward me! He was doing that rushing-forward-to-scare-the-danger-away walk. It was quite an intimidating thing to encounter in the midst of meditation!
But he stopped abruptly when he realized I wasn’t turning to run. I felt no fear and just gazed at him lovingly. He returned my gaze with an equally loving look in his eyes. He is there every time I visit this place. Every. Single. Time. He hasn’t rushed me since. We simply look at each other; and I feel better.
So, the point of telling you all of this is to share the joy of realizing that at any point on the journey something simple; something that may have always been known or present can facilitate a powerful shift. In one moment —any moment– something seemingly insurmountable can simply dissolve.
I’ve opened up more space for Ganesha in my days now; humming his mantra to myself, and journeying to my calm place by choice, as well as necessity when I catch my inner critic getting uppity!
May I suggest that you go within and find the calming place at your center. Afterward, you may find it helpful to use visual or audible reminders of what you found there.
I have a picture of Ganesha as the screen saver on my phone. Just looking at it can instantly invoke the feeling I get from his loving gaze, even when I don’t have the freedom to sit and meditate.
Peace to you,
Samantha